Waiting for the rain to wash it away.

image source:davefontaine.com

it's been days since there had been a decent nice downpour here in the big city.


the screen lights up that small corner of the room as i dim down the lights; rachael yamagata croons "be be your love" into my ears and merges her velvety voice with the pitter-patter of the soft rain against the windows of the room.


sometimes, things only serve as a happenstance, even though we always try to believe that it's arranged for us that way.


have you ever thought about how other people are always luckier than you are?


like when you look at somebody else in a photo and you think to yourself: "why can't i be as pretty as she is?" or "why can't i have everything that she has?"


it's times like these that cause me to ponder about life the most.


有些时候，总觉得自己不够好；

一直都做不到更好的。



有一部分的我，已经很满足了；

可是，

还有一部分的我，总觉得自己很没用。

看见别人多快乐

就会觉得自己不够幸福。



我知道，

自己的日子已过得不错了；

我也没资格埋怨那么多。



可是，

有些时候，

有一些感觉是避免不了的。



我很好，

也没什么不开心的事；

但是就是有些时候，

觉得我生命中

还缺少了些东西。



the rain always has its ways with me.


唉~

讨厌它也不是，

喜欢它也不是。。。



好矛盾噢，羽 （雨）。

Guess who's got a blog now?

this one does.

hehehhehhehheh.





wahai kawan kawan of the monkey! click here to link her. : )

JENNIFER CHUNG EP'S OUT!!!

owh yes, what better to do than promote one of your favourite singer's EP when it comes out?


: )

jen chung, the one and only. : )

i knew of this startling talent through one of my good butt-ies the quarantined monkey Michelle Hee. i've always prided myself in knowing all these awesome friends with the greatest tastes in Music. : ) and i have to say that by knowing these people, i have access to the best music around.


jen chung, currently around 20 years of age, is Korean with the most amazing smile around. and when she starts singing, it blows you away. : )

jen's cover of "New Soul" by Yael Naim

this was the first song i watched from jen and what caught my attention about this video wasn't only because of jen's singing but also how she enjoyed the music so much when she was singing it.

and to me that's what music is all about - having fun. : )

jennifer's single "Common, Sinmple, Beautiful".

another main reason why i love jen and her music is because she's so down to earth and her music is so easy for people to relate to. it's not everyday you find singers so down to earth and fun like jen. : )

her original song "common, simple, beautiful" is my favourite so far. the rhythm is so raw and beautiful and the lyrics speaks to you so tenderly that i can't help but fall in love with it really.

jen has just the most amazing way of capturing my heart.

jen, introducing her new EP

i really hope that someone will sign jen up really soon because she is just one of those talents that cannot be wasted.



check jennifer chung and her awesome music out at these websites:

Jennifer Chung on MySpace.com

Jennifer Chung on Facebook.com






keep up the good work jen chung. you've got so many fans all around the world and your music is so good, people would be crazy not to sign you up. : )












meanwhile...





CAN SOMEONE PLEASE GET ME JEN'S EP PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE?!?! *cries* i would super love it if someone did.

Happy Chinese "牛" Year, all the way from KayElle.

it's my first experience in spending chinese new year here in the big city.





somehow it feels very different.






there isn't any fireworks at 12am in the morning.

everyone only wakes up after 11am to prepare for chinese new year.

i can't see or hear any lion-dances here.

people in the big city only start going to family and friends' houses as late as 10pm at night to celebrate chinese new year.







it really is a far cry from my chinese new year days in miri.



and one of my new experiences?



....




there isn't any water supply here in serdang jaya.


yes.

no water.



no effin water.



the first day of chinese new year where people come and visit and eat a lot thus resulting in the loads of dishes in the sink...

and there isn't any water for us to clean them with.





a whole day of visiting and going around which resulted in gallons of sweating and the crazy amount of oil on my face...

and there isn't any water for us to clean ourselves with.






like omg SCREAM I NEED WATER PLEASE wtf.



T___________________________________________________T







and i am also so very lucky to have my "aunt" come visit me too. friggin two weeks earlier what the efffffffffffffff!!!!1111

=_____=






so yeah. happy chinese new year.


hope yours is better than mine. XD

The Haha Resemblance.

seeting brought me, erica and en en to KLCC today for a trip down to Aquaria!!!


not that it's THAT interesting but it was fun nonetheless.





and i visited KINOKUNIYAAAAAA!!11111 in my heart of hearts i was screaming FINALLY and i could hear the halleujah chorus in my ears when i stepped into that lovely heaven of a bookstore.

got myself "The Diary of a Young Girl: Anne Frank" today.


i've always wanted to get that book, and today i did. : )










althea headed off to taiping earlier today. i sent her a message last night saying that i'm heading off to KLCC today and guess what she said?






"OMG HAHAHAHA YOU'RE GOING TO VISIT THE JAGUNG HAR! HAHAHA"

(jagung is malay for corn)






lol that made me laugh like mad right after reading the message. i can't even believe that i understood her straight away.

but i think that it's a rather interesting way of putting the twin-towers! hehe.

catch the resemblance?

hehehe. : D

Random pictures by Rebekah.

i'm still counting down the days when i am reunited with my baby boyfriend number 2 (my beloved baby camera).




but till then,

these are the only pictures of college i could give ya'll.




pictures courtesy of rebekah's phone camera. : ) thanks 大姐！

this *shy* person is althea. and beside her sits the most annoying octopus who is on steroids. hehehe.

the so-called octopus on steroids.

l-r: the madness suemae, rebekah “大姐”, the octopus on steroids and juann the jolly-bee.
(behind suemae is philip rom who's also from sarawak and the girl in grey beside him and also behind rebekah is the infamous caryn who loves food like no other.)

i wish i had more photos of the others to show you guys, but this is all i have at the moment.

but i promise that as soon as my baby boyfriend number 2 arrives, there wouldn't be enough space for our faces here.



hehehe. ; )














oookay now back to my movie review.

The longest night.

this is the longest i've ever stayed up until ever since i've first arrived in the big city.



today is michellious' most hectic of days...




(edit: oooohh one of my housemates just came down and said hi. :D)




ANYWAY.




the group of friends i have here threw giggling fits today in class. i don't know what's gotten into us but we're rather crazy in that sense. somehow, no matter how different each and every one of us are, i think i'm starting to get used to this class being so nutty in the head. : )






went for my first photography club meeting today. our club president reminds me of CGL for some reason.... but my verdict is that she's cuter.

*runs as J and CGL chase after me with stakes*

paid RM10 as registration fee and t-shirt deposit.

AM GOING TO PULAU KETAM AS A PHOTOGRAPHY FIELD TRIP IN FEBRUARY!! WHEE! : D





rush rush RUSHED to the mall after classes today to do some last-minute shopping with a bunch of my friends.

at first i wasn't going to spend any money on anything...

BUT I JUST HAD TO GET THAT ROXY SHIRT LIKE ZOMG IT'S THE CUTEST!!!!





and so i did. : )



i know i know i know, RM89.90 for a shirt is a TEENY-WEENY bit too much to spend on a t-shirt that's only made of flimsy 100% organic cotton. XP



wanna seeeeeee?

like so. : )

sexeh, eh? : D


and i got two other shirts too. both for RM40 at IZO. it was really awesome to get a couple more shirts for my Chinese New Year. i wasn't planning on having an awesome one this year since i'm not HOME celebrating it, but splurging on things made me feel a BIT better.

: )




after that we basically ran around to use up the teeny bits of our time that we had left. juann and rebekah were going at such a high-speed with their shopping that it was quite hard for me and althea to catch up with! hehe. but nonetheless it was fun going around.

; )





only seconds after i rushed home, uncle tay and aunty pat arrived at my place to take me out for dinner.

we walked around IKEA for a while because uncle tay needed to get some things. i have not been to IKEA for the LONGEST of time, and being back there made me feel like a kid again.

the enormity of the warehouse, the colours of the showrooms, the texture of the tiles and sofas; being in that very place really made me regret not taking up interior designing in the first place.



I WANT A CHANGE OF COURSES!!!!!!!111111 (which in my opinion would never happen. ever.)





after that we had dinner and a few drinks. i had 0.3 litres of german beer and i turned AS RED AS A TOMATO. like literally. XD

dang i REALLY hate the side effects that the consumption of alcohol gives me.





i only got home about 11.15pm. did some packing and am currently sitting here now, typing out this blog post while waiting for my laundry to be done.


(edit: SHYTE I FORGOT TO WASH MY CLOTHES AND BATH TOWEL SEPARATELY!!!!!11111 now my dark coloured shirt and pants are all covered with fleeces of cotton. X______________X wahhhhhhh i am so dumb wtf.)


school's off for a week for the Chinese New Year holidays until the 2nd of February. will be moving in with my parent's friend and his family. michellious will be going vegan for the week too fyi.

am going to do some last minute packing before i head off to bed.



and exams are after the holidays. (>_<)

meep.


till then, signing off! : )

[ damn lah it's 2am in the morning. TIRED WEI. zZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZ...)


============================================

MISS T STOP BUBBLE-WRAPPING ME ON FACEBOOK!





i'm staying as FAR away from you and your yards of bubble-wrap now.


o_O

lol.

At times.

i like it when good things happen.


i like it when people smile at me.


i like it when the most unexpected happy things jump right in your embrace,
just like that.


i like being random.


i like sharing laughter with a group of friends.


i like being close to just that one person.


i like doing things for people and seeing them smile.


i like it when i know there's an extra sparkle in the way they look at me.


i like it when people actually care.


i like the way people laugh out loud. a big, hearty laughter.


i like listening to A Fine Frenzy and indulging in the night breeze that comes blowing from my window.


i like finding out new things that make me feel better.


i like realizing that there will always be someone out there, no matter where you are.









doesn't it make you wonder sometimes how life can be so unpredictable?

Farewell, my pet!

GOODBYE MONKEY MONKEY!!

i can't believe that you're actually leaving us already.



promise me that you'll take care of yourself over there, monkey? because i can't bear to lose one of my closest mates in the world. : )




remember to eat properly!

remember to skype me once in a while!

remember to clean your laundry everyday!

remember to take care of yourself!

remember to drink water everyday!

remember to clean yourself everyday!

remember to remember me!

: )





loads of kisses kisses,
michellious. : )

Tit-bits of the little things.

watched freedom writers today because miss t went for a workshop thing at some school. now i'm convinced to write a review for freedom writers instead of the longshot.






i cooked today. COOKED. yes, michellious cooked today.

lol not that there's anything to be proud of since i burnt my veges to a crisp in my first attempt. but i thought twice and decided to boil them instead. hehe. it's official - i am going to be the worst housewife EVER. haha.

but it's like what they say: we'd eventually get a hang of things after we get pass the numerous failed attempts.

and in my case, the food poisoning.

hehehe.






i got ill on sunday. cirit-birited like it was nobody's business. zomg no.







i can't believe exams are after chinese new year. i think i desperately need a break but quite frankly there isn't time for any. i'm beginning to have second thoughts about taking foundation already. lol but i suppose i'm stuck with it now. hehe.










JASON MRAZ CONCERT AT STADIUM KUALA LUMPUR ON THE 4TH OF MARCH!!!!

i'm still wondering whether i should go. i mean i WANT to, but there just isn't enough factors for me to go ahead and buy the tickets. i would prefer numbered seats but those would cost me around RM168. a little bit far from the stage summore.

so maybe i'll just let this opportunity slip by.

call me only if there's a michelle branch concert and i'm willing to buy the RM250 tickets for the free standing tickets in front of the stage. hehehehehe.









chinese new year's around the corner. somehow, not being able to celebrate it with my family is killing the joy i once had for CNY.

well, at least i'm going over to my mum's friend's place for the week.

i'm going vegan. lol.













my monkey's leaving for new zealand tomorrow. and she's going there for good.

MONKEY MONKEY I AM GOING TO MISS YOU LIKE CRAZY!!!

take care of yourself for me okay? i'll send over a banana once in a while, those big big indian bananas that you love so much, yes? : )










i'm beginning to get fat again i think. i think i need to reduce my daily consuming intake.









7 weeks more till my next flight home.

okay okay okay i know i shouldn't be counting down the days but i can't help it!! *dies










----------------------------------------------------


i caught her reading coelho's book the other day

for a moment

i felt so intrigued to talk to her

but i didn't.



sometimes i wish we weren't so different

so that it would've been easier for us to be friends.

Sweep me away. : )

this was the only thing that kept me from falling into pieces today.



"love story" by taylor swift



We were both young when I first saw you
I close my eyes
And the flashback starts
I'm standing there
On a balcony of summer air

See the lights,
See the party, the ball gowns
I see you make your way through the crowd
You say hello
Little did I know

That you were Romeo you were throwing pebbles
And my daddy said stay away from Juliet
And I was crying on the staircase
Begging you please don't go, and I said:

Romeo take me somewhere we can be alone
I'll be waiting all there's left to do is run
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess
It's a love story baby just say yes

So I sneak out to the garden to see you
We keep quiet cause we're dead if they know
So close your eyes
Escape this town for a little while

Cause you were Romeo I was a scarlet letter
And my daddy said stay away from Juliet
But you were everything to me
I was begging you please don't go and I said:

Romeo take me somewhere we can be alone
I'll be waiting all there's left to do is run
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess
It's a love story baby just say yes

Romeo save me, they try to tell me how to feel
This love is difficult, but it's real,
Don't be afraid
We'll make it out of this mess
It's a love story baby just say yes, oh,

I got tired of waiting
Wondering if you were ever coming around
My faith in you was fading
When I met you on the outskirts of town I said:

Romeo save me I've been feeling so alone
I keep waiting for you but you never come
Is this in my head, I don't know what to think
He knealt to the ground and pulled out a ring

And said:

Marry me Juliet you'll never have to be alone
I love you and that's all I really know
I talked to your dad go pick out a white dress
It's a love story baby just say yes

Oh, oh, oh

Oh, oh, oh, oh

Cause we were both young when I first saw you




taylor's grown up so much, it's a wonder how much more i love her now! ^_^ even more than ever. i should've fallen in love with it sooner but then again if i did, i wouldn't be loving it enough to keep me from breaking right now. : )

thanks taylor. only the greatest of musicians is able to do that. : )

Musically Speaking - Jan 16, 2009

"If the hawks in the trees need the dead,
If you're living you don't stand a chance.
For a time, though you share the same bed,
There are only two ends to this dance."

- Elephants by Rachael Yamagata.

it's been two weeks here already and i'm still feeling like a bunch of mess due to my homesickness.

this is so pathetic. : (





i'm beginning to dislike my fridays and weekends now. they make me wonder what i should do in my apartment. my very very boring apartment. going out seems like a good idea... if i weren't living in a place where i'm constantly reminded of the dangers of theives and pick-pockets.

i'm suppose to enjoy life in college, not friggin SUFFOCATE in it. O_O





thanks tiff, for calling me on my phone using your skype credit. talking to you makes me feel a little less tense. now i understand how big a deal homesickness was for you when you went off to michigan. [ huggles ]







officially 8 more weeks to go before i pack up for home. mum's constantly nagging on me to not think about it, but how could i not when i miss her everyday?






omg i'm running out of cereal. food please.

Staring at red socks hanging in front of me.

the title implies exactly what i'm doing right now while i draft out my work for Dr. V's weekly journal assignment.







nothing much to write about today.





was assigned task by miss t to forward all documents that had failed to be posted on BlackBoard 7 (college student portal online) to all 24 of my classmates. i can ACTUALLY feel the weight and pressure of the responsibility on my hands just by holding this long list of emails.




ooooh wait. i can finally list out the names of my course mates in perfect and accurate spelling now:

caryn
jasmine
wei wen (raymond)
sheena
evonne
mark
yosva (joshua)
su
lin
nadhirah
philip
omar
neeshan
zanardy
faye
joey
raihana
simitha
syaza
jun-elle
amber
jer renn
althea
dixie
suemae
rebekah
ju ann


yeah you don't need me to say it again what the bolded names mean. : )






had 2 hours of free period. had lunch with the bunch (oooh this rhymes!). kept calling juann by the name of christy for some reason. hehe. then moved on to the library where every single one of my classmates were rushing to have their IT assignments printed out.





had an hour left on the clock before starting classes with Dr. V at 2.

spent it running around school with neeshan the maldives air stewardess (course mate) to look for internet connection. the ones in the student lounge, library and ICT rooms were down.

finally sneaked into the computer lab classes and found perfect connection there. hehe.







had classes with Dr. V from 2-5. the first two hours were torturous because i was trying so hard not to doze off... but the whole cass went into a giggling fit at the last hour because of the group project we had to do - radio ads.


rebekah makes a bloody good load shark. XD








after school i globbered down 11 pieces of sour skittles WITH the addition of the sour salts at the bottom of the packet.

won 7 ringgit off the bet from dixie and yosva. hehehe.










i am feeling all the pain now because


1- it's close to darkness. the homesickness is closing in on me

and

2- i am going to miss the awesome chance of a lifetime to go see the RM10 poetry gig at the annexe, central market with the awesome-st miss michy due to my assignment. : (





d'oh.






so i guess i better get started. [ pout ]

Human Comm Class. Student ID. Danny Boy!

miss t had us down in the room today and we watched a movie called "The Longshots".

we had to write a review based on the movie that was shown to us and we are required to apply the comm skills we aquired in class earlier into the review.

due date: after chinese new year.

met cai lin today during lunch.



cai lin: eh what you guys do for classes today ah?

us: we watched a movie today during human comm class owh.

cai lin: fwah~ it's like you guys paid 4000+ per sem just to watch movies during class man.

us: ....



putting it like that really makes us think twice about foundation. haha.

everytime i look at my student ID i want to run and scream and burn down the school for giving me a picture like that.


and the woman at the student services center said i'm stuck with that blardy picture for the next FOUR YEARS OF COLLEGE!!!!


and so i HAD to think of something to save me from the embarrassment...

i drew a picture of a yellow box and placed it in front of my picture.

like so.

ehehheh.








I MET DANIEL AKA HAN THU AT COLLEGE TODAY!! he was just having lunch at the mamak stalls situated in the campus but turns out that he lives in my area too. : )


see me become a squealing bunch of craziness for my olaf. : DDD

Class...4?

currently decaying and freezing to death in the IT Lab in college, stealing the internet line to blog because THE LINE BACK AT MY PLACE KEEPS DYING ON ME!!!

effin blargh. =_=




today is the fourth day of my college year. STILL homesick, nonetheless. trying to cope by hanging out with most of my classmates as much as possible.



bought my IT class textbook for RM60. it feels odd having swept off RM40 short of a hundred just like that for a textbook. i have yet to pay for 2 more english books. i can feel my wallet screaming.





had mamak with miss michy yesterday. bumped into her at college on my way to IT classes. was loving her outfit... and guess what? ALL FOR UNDER RM30 LIKE ZOMG. bazaar here i come! heh.





homesickness level most intense at night now. a loss of apetite is what i am suffering from as a side effect.




lala bear's officially going back for chinese new year. and i felt like T____________________________________________________________T when she told me the other day. not that i would lock myself in my room 24/7 for a week, but I AM FRIGGIN HOMESICK. TAKE ME HOME!!! and i don't care if you pack me inside a crate and ship me off to Miri.


and i miss home food. T_T






mid-terms in two weeks mid-terms in two weeks mid-terms in two weeks mid-terms in two weeks.

zomg. O_O






i have the suckiest internet connection ever. lala bear has totally zip problem with hers while mine keeps going off EVERY SINGLE TIME i go on skype and msn.

like ftw.






haiyo i am missing people. heartbreak. : ' (







i am living on cereal and biscuits and leftovers everyday. i think i *WOULD* probably lose a little weight even if i try not to.




it's 8.09am and we're STILL waiting on our lecturer.

i am dozing off. =_____________________= zZzZzZzZzZzZz

Finding my solace.

哭过了就算了。
(things will still go on after a long, good crying.)

i sat alone in front of the laundry room thinking about home earlier tonight. i threw my old pajamas into the wash and turned the timer on. but this night, i brought down coelho's "Veronika Decides to Die" with me to kill time.


i sat cross-legged in the chair as my eyes devoured the book in silence. as soon as i landed on page 22, i felt this sudden pang of clarity inside of me. i thought about my family back at home but the usual intensity of overflowing homesickness didn't affect me that much at that moment.


placing my book down, i closed my eyes and took a deep breath and let out a deep, long sigh. i averted my gaze from the book in my lap to look outside the laundry room windows, placing my sight upon the wonders of Sunway Pyramid's glamorous scenery at night. it's beauty was unmistakable, with the city's bright lights illuminating the fierce lion's head and bringing it to life, boasting the city's infamous night life.

looking outside, i still felt that i wouldn't be able to fit in.



so far my stay here has been acceptable, but the only problem killing me slowly was my homesickness. i never thought leaving for college would have such an effect on me, and i never thought i would feel so much like an outsider here.

i kept my gaze steady on the scenery and i never once took my eyes off it.


then it hit me.

i understood at that instant what my problem was and i kept my finger on it.


bringing myself back from my thoughts, i placed my arms on the washing machine and rested my chin on them as i looked at my clothes, thrown in a whirlpool of soap water and turned rapidly back and forth back and forth back and forth.

as soon as i got my laundry done, i brought myself back to my room in a series of quick steps. i settled down in front of my computer screen and began to type out the URL onto the address bar.






click.





click.






click.






click.






click.





"book time?"





click.





"confirm selection?"





click.







===========================

TRANSACTION COMPLETE

===========================
















i know there's still a long way to go,

but my heart will find it's peace again this march.

Her.

i could still feel the warmth of her touch on my left arm.

we slept in the darkness, our hands linked in a bond. engulfed in silence, we didn't have to speak to understand each other. i could feel her tears as she could mine.


i never knew it was that unbearable but i know this is what i will have to face from today onwards.


in a few hours time she would board the plane and i would not be able to touch her and feel her presence with me for a period of time. the time will come when one day i am able to be in her arms again but until then, Time will pass me by ever slowly, painfully.



i think of her and i cry.

i think of her laughter and i cry.

i think of her comforting hugs and i cry.

i think of her sacrifice for me for so many years and i cry.




i'm going to miss you. and i'm counting down the days until i can be in your arms again like how you once held me when i first opened my eyes. don't worry too much about me, as i was brought up under your care. i will learn how to be strong, as you have for me.


i love you mum.

very, very much.


:'(

Update on college life.

first thing's first:

I ORIGINALLY WANTED TO BLOG A FEW DAYS AGO BUT I COULDN'T BECAUSE THE IDIOTIC BLARDY WI-FI CONNECTION AT MY AREA KEEPS DYING!!!


grr.



okay back to my updates. : )





it's been my second day of classes and it's proven to be a stressful job. things are really different here in college as the assignments (particularly the essays) require you to really, REALLY THINK.

you could imagine my face when my English for College Studies lecturer wanted us to write something on wars and economic crises. my mind was already screaming "GAH WHAT IS THIS I DON'T EVEN READ THE NEWS!!!!1111"

sometimes i think that college essays are a big pain in my fingers: LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS OF WRITINGGGGGGGGG. and the THINKING oooooh the THINKING! it's even worse than English Lit!!!!



but i guess this is what we have to cope with when i'm doing my higher education eh? and a little bit of global news never hurt nobody. : )





i found out there's around 20-ish students in my foundation course.

dixie
yosua (from indonesia)
rebekah
althea
sue mae
janelle
amber
jer ren
caryn
jasmine
sheena
yvonne
nisha (from maldives)
phillip
omar (from pakistan)
joey
faye
zunardi -not sure about the spelling though-
mark
sim
lin (from myanmar)
ju-en
syaza
anna



[ bolded ones are the ones i *currently* hang out with. ]

yeah i guess that's about it. i'm not sure if i have everybody and this is all i can remember but it's quite an accomplishment eh? i doubt that even my lecturers can do a better job than this.

okay kidding. ; )





so far i only have three subjects this semester:

Introduction to Human Communication - Ms T
English for College Studies 1 - Dr. V
Introduction to Information Technology - Mr. E


but my schedule is JAM-PACKED like mad. classes start everyday from 8am and i have to get up at 6am earliest if i want to get ready everything by 7.30am to meet up with Dix for classes.



and in two weeks time, i'd be sitting my big bulgy butt in the exam hall for my mid-terms.


MID-TERMS. only TWO WEEKS after school first started.

how insanely rushed is that??

you tell me lah!





and i think almost all the students in my course has a blog. it's highly unlikely that mass comm students don't have a blog. i mean, everyone describes the mass comm students as those who never shut up! now, i personally am not the type of person who talks a lot, and yet i have a blog. so try imagining how a bunch of talkative and outgoing people not owning a blog.


highly unlikely, right?



but i'm glad to say that maybe that isn't such a bad thing after all. finally i can find more people who're like me - blog crazy. : )






sometimes i still worry about not fitting in though. i do have a tiny group of new friends here but whether we'd stay that way or not, i'd never know.





a huge bunch of thanks though, to those who left comments on my homesick blog post. i really appreciate the kindness and comfort. although i'm not anywhere near to healing my homesick soul, the comments make me smile and think of all the other friends who are away too.





till then, i STILL miss home and everyone else i love who're back there.


i miss you, people. _glomps_

Breaking down at the break of dawn.

i don't want to open my eyes;





i don't want to open my eyes to a different darkness.

i don't want to open my eyes in fear knowing that it's not home.

i don't want to open my eyes and realising that all that it was was just a dream.

i don't want to open my eyes to know that i have to endure almost 3 months of this before i go home.

i don't want to open my eyes because i know that when i do, i have to cope.

i don't want to open my eyes to what everyday for the rest of the year would be like - not HOME.

i don't want to open my eyes and think about what lies ahead of me; for me.

i don't want to open my eyes and convice myself that i'm not with my family anymore.

i don't want to open my eyes to let the tears drench my face.








i hate waking up in the mornings now. it's when my homesickness starts dwelling really hard and deep into me.

:'(

First day of college.

“What? You can speak Mandarin? I thought you can’t! You sound so English!”

So far, that remark doesn’t seem to bother me in college. Maybe it’s the fact that it’s English-speaking people saying that to me instead of the usual Mandarin-speaking people I meet back at home.


Quite frankly (and I am quite amazed that I’m admitting this), my first day of college surprised me. There weren’t as many people as I imagined taking mass communication, and there were lesser people taking the foundation course as compared to the diploma course.

I’m quite satisfied with the thought that only a few people are taking the course with me, even though that meant higher competitiveness between the students. Met our course lecturers today too. I wouldn’t exactly say that I am I love with them (yet), but they do exert a certain air of greatness and there is this feeling about them which I can’t seem to put my fingers on but I suppose I’d have to wait and see.


One of the head lecturers of the mass communication department gave a speech today during the orientation and she asked us a very simple, yet thought-provoking question:

“What is your goal in life?”

I was among the ones who couldn’t exactly say I have a goal but I do have some in mind. Her question really made me reflect upon myself, both as a student and as a person. Balancing both my responsibilities and desires seem almost too impossible a job for me as I’ve never been able to do both at the same time properly.

But I’d have to take up the challenge, whether I like it or not.




Got my timetable today too. They say college has lesser classes - but I strongly disagree with that at some point. Classes from 8 in the morning till 6pm!!! IMAGINE THAT! And it'll take more than just book-reading for the most of it.

Aiks.





Met new people here too and honestly, it feels like Chung Hua all over again. The people taking the mass communication course remind me so much of the people back in high school, it’s... nostalgic. But at least I’m glad to say that I’ve met a few people in college whom I think I might get along great with.

Thanks Miss Michy, for telling me about Dixie! : )




Met the last of my housemates today too. Natasha seemed nicer somehow, even if Uncle James said she’s a bit on the quite side. She’s proving to be one of the nicest though.



Earlier on I had dinner with mum and a family of my parents’ friends. It was awesome. I haven’t felt like I’ve had a hearty family meal for days – VEGETARIAN summore.

Mum’s moving in again tomorrow night.

I CAN’T WAIT!!! : D





Well that about sums up my time today. It's not exactly an "OMG-THIS-IS-TOTALLY-BLARDY-AWESOME!!!!1111" kind of feeling, but it was definitely better than what I've expected.






More updates to come tomorrow! But for now, it's time to turn out the lights. : )

Quickie, from my room.

it's currently my second night here in the big city.




is odd and unfamiliar.






and i feel the most intense homesick-ness ever.

i mean, my mum's still going to be around until the end of next week! and i'm STILL homesick.



i seriously can't imagine how it'd be like after she leaves.


: (





so far the apartment's tolerable...

... only during the day.


at night, the place's bloody scary and i feel like crying everytime. (>_<)



michellious has yet to meet 3 other housemates. so far i have only met one.






city's alright. but i wish the people here were more friendly.



finally i could say that i've been to all those fancy branded stores and stuff...

... but the women who shop there and the clothes make me feel extra self-conscious.






someone please tell me mass comm students in taylors aren't as bad as how the people here say they are, because if so - i won't find no friends here. : (






so i guess so far, michellious is TRYING to fit in and adapt.



orientation's on monday.





and i only have less than a day's time to convince myself that it isn't as bad as it already is...





will update soon. hopefully my next update would be about something better than what i've been through.

Off I go!

boarding the plane to kay-elle soon.



imma miss home. : (




no posts till i find myself an internet line somewhere.




and my camera would be at home, so do forgive me if i post lousy pictures. XO

hehe...




till then,



i'll see you guys soon. : )

Happy 2009 ya'll. : )

another year's past, and here comes a new one.

happy new year, everyone! may the best be with you throughout the things and understakings of life. : )




okay so here's the sitch: it's friggin 2.44am in the morning and i am DYING to get to bed because i have yet to double check my luggage to see if i've missed anything for my flight at 9-ish tonight. i planned on getting into detail but i'm too tired so here are just some peekchures for your viewing pleasure.


not that it's anything interesting but if you're too bored online and need some entertainment, we're just about the right set of goons for the job.


hehe.


but basically my bunch of crazy friends and i hang out at marriott hotel, sipping tea and henessy at illy's (okay maybe not henessy heheh) and counting down the minutes.














and here's the snapple gang! (snapple's the only beverage worth paying for at marriott's illy's. did you know that they charge RM7 for a can of pepsi light? SEVEN BLOODY RINGGIT OKAY FTW?!)









prezzies! our presents! we had this idea about exchanging gifts before each and every one of us leaves so we all bought presents for each of us together!!

pretty silly thing for 18 year olds to do but heck at least we enjoy our youth while we can. : )

















we didn't even realise it until the fireworks went off when midnight struck. but around 12 in the morning, we headed to the carpark and it was time...


for camwhoring!!!

to the carpark we go!

first decent group photo!

and then...



it got freakeh!



















we attempted the jump!! : ) this has always been THE picture that i wanted to try taking.









... and eventually we had to try it lots of times. lol.

my monkey and me!

michellious, being bullied by the monkey one last time before i part.

Boys, will be Boys.
l-r:wei ming, dean, louis and gan. : )

thanks lala, dean, zin, grizzy, bellie, wei ming, louis and agan for spending the first few minutes of 2009 with me. : )


lots of love!

xoxo